And They Died
by ParodyHeart
Summary: When a character does something extremely out of character, the world ends because of it. Warnings: Is a parody, contains bestiality, character death, some mature language and themes, and the end of the world. Chapters are individual and are not related to each other.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: ParodyHeart owns nothing.

Summary: When Percy does something extremely out of character (ah, the teen hormones), the world ends because of it.  
Warnings: Is a parody, contains bestiality, character death, some mature language and themes, and the end of the world.

A/N: Co-written with a certain someone that doesn't want to be mentioned.

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Percy blinked slowly before his eyes fluttered open. Automatically, he reached towards his jean pocket, but he didn't know why. When he pulled out a ballpoint pen, he was puzzled as to why it was there. He was never one for writing. He held it before his face for a few moments, trying to remember why, exactly, he had a pen in his pocket. Something in the back of his head was nagging at him, insisting it was important.

It wasn't until now he noticed a large, dark brown figure standing over him. His mind was too focused on figuring out where he was and what the hell was going on, he didn't notice the mammal.

"Uh..." Percy smiled nervously. "Hi?"

It let out a deep, throaty growl, and Percy smushed himself to the floor harder.

"Look, if this is your pen, you can have it. I don't even know how I got it."

Percy pulled out his bronze pen, and the wolf's eyes widened.

"Greetings, demigod," It, he now knew she, saluted.

Percy was overtaken by the urge to pull out his meaty cock and fuck the bitch senseless.

"Get over here bitch," Percy stood up on surprisingly steady legs, and dropped his pants.

The wolf's eyes widened even more before she snarled and backed away, leaning on her haunches for support. She looked ready to spring forward and shred Percy to little pieces. She bared her teeth and growled.

"You better not growl at me bitch, time to show you who's dominant."

Percy got behind the wolf and positioned himself.

The wolf whined before lurching forward in attempt to get away, but Percy grabbed her around the waist possessively and held her snapping jaws shut with his other hand.

"Relax," Percy said soothingly.

But this little action made Percy loosen his grip on the wolf and she bounded away as quickly as she could before snapping her jaws in disgust and closing her teeth around Percy's hand.

The hand snapped off and Lupa ripped off the rest of his other arm.

After screaming very loudly and finding the animal control number and calling from a phone he found in the warehouse, he passed out and died of blood loss soon after. Animal control found him dead. They had not came soon enough.

The downfall of the Olympians and the world as we know it came quickly.

With Percy dead, the campers at Camp Half Blood were left without a real leader. Jason couldn't handle leading the two rival camps.

Lupa was shot down and killed by the mortals who mistook her for a rabid wolf. The Romans were left vulnerable.

And the world perished all because of some horny teenager.

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Review! Please! More! Parodies! In the making!


	2. Horsey

**Parody Heart: Hello. **

**Parody Heart and the co-writer own nothing.**

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Percy ambled slowly from his cabin to the Big House. Chiron had called him there urgently that morning and Percy complied, ever obedient. Percy didn't know what the matter was, but was sure it wasn't anything good. Chiron had sounded way too excited over the intercom.

The morning dew of the grass soaked his shoes and stained the cuffs of his blue jeans. To Chiron, he was visible from the distance by his messy black hair and a certain glowing object sticking out of his pocket.

Even now, he knew something was up. Chiron was jittering in place, almost bouncing back and forth. Percy laughed mentally, it was an odd sight. Sort of looked like he was humping an imaginary woman. (Unbeknownst to Percy, if anything, male not female)

He warily stepped onto the porch.

Oh, how he wished he would've just sprinted for Argos' van right then and there.

"Good morning, my boy." Chiron said, jerking Percy out of his musings. "Come inside. We have much to...discuss..._over the table_."

Percy gave a good-natured smile. "I hope it isn't bad news?"

Chiron licked his lips, something Percy had never seen him do before. "No. It is very good, _pleasing_ news."

"That's good..?" Was Percy's awkward reply, and after registering Chiron's unusual demeanor fully, stepped through the door.

Chiron licked his lips again and his eyes assumed a startling glint. "Very good, indeed."

Percy wanted to ask what was so important, why he was here. But Chiron obviously wanted to keep it a secret until the right time.

He didn't know what to do. Was he to just stand there shuffling his legs and running his hands through his black locks? He could strike up a conversation, but about what? He didn't have any suitable thing to talk to the activity leader- a millennia year old centaur- about.

The tension was so thick Percy wanted to make a run for it. Chiron was always weird, but this was downright strange. That sparkling look of an emotion he couldn't quite place, in the centaur's eye. The way he sort of squeezed his hind legs together, trying to hide something big.

"Chiron," Percy began awkwardly. He shoved his hands into his pockets. "Are you hiding something from me? Something important?"

Percy was tired of the waiting. He had walked here, not knowing why, and once he was here he was still being stalled upon. But suddenly, before he could even say "What the fuck there's a horny, mythological horse after me. I have to run but I'm still surprised. Where should I go" Chiron screamed.

"Just my ten inch cock!" Chiron sprang upon the door and locked it behind him. Then he stared at Percy with anticipation. "You're going to be so much better than Achilles. And Hercules. That damn boy almost killed me!"

Nobody wants to hear the details about how or why Chiron did the things he did. Those details are enough to make any insane man deeper down that path of insanity.

The only thing that matters is that Percy, the savior of the godly world, was raped over and over and over and over and over on a table for thirty consecutive hours and twenty four minutes and three seconds by a horse dick. Anally, of course. What else?

And the second important thing to know is that Percy lost a lot of blood. And that Chiron is some mix between a sadist and a masochist and also had some weird handcuff/marijuana/whip/raw-egg-rolling-across-the -floor fetish.

Oh yeah, Percy died. Of blood loss. But it's okay. It would have been better than getting Chiron's multiple STD's and dying of AIDS.

Unfortunately, the world didn't live without Percy. Annabeth went insane and got lost on her trip to find the Mark of Athena. Everybody pretty much went down the same road.

But some good came of all this! Chiron was fired for good.

To sum this tragic story up (anybody need a tissue box?), the world ended all because of an OOC Centaur's horniness and lack of self control.

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**Co-writer: Hmm. I would ask for suggestion in your reviews, but I'm not sure I want to because I don't want your hopes to rise then be disappointed because we didn't use your idea. But you can if you want to. We don't have it planned out. We just think of an idea for the next chapter and go. **

**By the way, these oneshots will all involve Percy, Funny OOCness, and the end of the world. But anything other than that you can suggest.**

**ParodyHeart: GUESS THE CO-WRITERS NAME AND YOU'LL RECEIVE A SPECIAL SHOUTOUT NEXT ONE-SHOT. I LOVE YOU ALL, WHICH IS WHY THIS DESERVES CAPS.**


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